The best way to describe the configuration of your threesome is by the genders of each person involved. For example, PPV means a threesome with a penis-owner, penis-owner, and vagina-owner.īut these terms can create gender or genital dysphoria in folks who don’t feel connected to their genitals. Sometimes, the phrases “penis-owner” and “vagina-owner” are used to explain the make-up of a threesome. The terms “male” and “female” suggest a biological binary that doesn’t exist. Nowadays, these designations are considered out of style. Historically, threesomes have been named according to the make-up of males and females in them. Sexual acts don’t determine sexual orientation - only self-identification does.Being in a threesome with someone doesn’t necessarily mean you’re going to be touching them.“But you can absolutely have a threesome with another man and still be straight as a door nail.” “There’s a common fear amidst straight men that you can’t be in a threesome with another man and still be straight,” explains Shelby Ring, sexuality advocate and lead educator with Ruby Riot Creatives (a boutique videography firm based in Charleston, South Carolina). You can be any gender, sex, or sexuality and enjoy a three-way. Tl dr: Anyone who wants to have a threesome can have one!ĭoes gender, sex, or sexual orientation matter? While there’s nothing (!!) wrong with this, the truth is that engaging in group sex doesn’t have to say anything about who you are. It’s important to note that neither the survey nor the 2017 study mentioned above polled folks of other genders.Ī sad consequence of living in a sex-negative society is that many often assume that threesomes are reserved for the kinkiest among us.
The survey didn’t break this fantasy down into specifics, so this figure could include other forms of group sex, too.Īll that said, some research suggests that only 10 percent of women and 18 percent of men have actually had a threesome. The disparity between the number of folks who want to have a threesome and the number of folks actually having them is probably a lot larger than you’ve been led to believe.Īccording to a survey of 4,175 adults conducted by Justin Lehmiller, PhD, a sex researcher and author of “ Tell Me What You Want: The Science of Sexual Desire and How It Can Help You Improve Your Sex Life,” 87 percent of women and 97 percent of men fantasize about having sex with more than one person.